Watching a game through the eyes of Chris Foukas

Let me make it clear that I do not like the Los Angeles Lakers nor do I like the Phoenix Suns. Whoever wins out of the Boston Celtics and Orlando Magic(which it looks like Boston would lay the wood to them tomorrow) that's who I want to win the NBA Finals. I've had numerous people ask what goes through my mind when I watch an NBA game, so I figured I'd give you an insight on what goes through Chris' brain while watching game 3 of the Lakers and Suns.

1st Quarter
9:40 - Robin Lopez aka Sideshow Bob throws a dunk back on Andrew Bynum bringing the Suns fans to their feet. (Note: Do you notice how every NBA team tries to do the white out or orange out thing? You know who started that right? One of the greatest teams in NBA history - the 2007 Golden State Warriors)

Robin Lopez


Can I just say I'm extremely excited to not have to listen to Doug Collins next year on TNT? I honestly think if Kobe Bryant took Doug Collins out on a date, Collins would give him some action.

Lakers lead the Suns by 3 after the first quarter. You'd think Alvin Gentry would realize that Grant Hill can't guard Kobe Bryant. Bryant has simply taken Hill to the woodshed this series.

2nd quarter
The Slovenian sensation who never woke up during the Suns Spurs series has now entered the game, I'm talking about Goran Dragic. Only good thing about Dragic is that he's left handed. (Note: Channing Frye is 6'10" and he still hasn't set foot in the paint since he's entered the game - who does he think he is Arvydas Sabonis?)

9:14 - Dragic makes a bonus and 1 against Andrew Bynum, shades of his BS coming back from the Spurs series. I don't think I would mind Dragic getting an elbow in the face right now.

On a side note, what's the over under for how many times Gasol screams down low when he's going up for a jump hook? I will say 19.5.

6:35 - Gizmo from The Gremlins (Jordan Farmer) just buried a three in the corner to put the Lakers up by six, I wonder if the guy can hear XM radio through his ears.

Jordan Farmer

4:03 - Grant Hill threads a no look pass to Robin Lopez who in the words of Bill Walton "Throws it down big man." Who else would like to see Robin Lopez in a Utah Jazz uniform? Someone that just plays defense and gets garbage points. My hand is raised.

Steve Nash might be the best point guard at keeping his dribble alive. I know coaches say dribbling too much can be bad but when Steve Nash is doing it good things happen. As I was typing that Nash hits his patented mid-range fadeaway jumped over Derek Fisher who surprisingly didn't fall down when he had a screen put on him.

On a mismatch Fisher fouls Robin Lopez in the post, and immediately does his stupid grin like "Wow, I'm the president of the players association and you called a foul on me." (Note: Players that smile when they get a foul called on them and who I'd like to fart in their face are as follows : Derek Fisher, Carmelo Anthony, JR SMith, Grant Hill, and Rasheed Wallace.) Bryant misses a three to end the half and the Suns lead the Lakers.

3rd Quarter

7:47 Robin Lopez puts the ball on the floor, spins to his left, and throws a jump hook over Pau Gasol. Lopez so far has been Phoenix's best player tonight. You'll never hear that often, that's like me saying O.J. was innocent. As I'm typing that, Derek Fisher hits a corner three, I can't stand him.

6:36 - Robin Lopez just became my favorite player in the league, as he runs down the court from Fisher pushing him, Lopez catches Fisher in the forehead with an elbow in which tough guy Fisher gets in his face, or his stomach I should say, don't bite his ankle D-Fish.

Lamar Odom looks disinterested tonight. Maybe it's because he watched the sexy video that Khole Kardashian made him, I know I would never be able to recover after watching that tragedy.

Nice commercial Hanes, do you honestly think Michael Jordan would be flying public transportation? That's like saying I'd go to Burger King when there's an In & Out Burger in my basement - - not happening.

4:13 - Every three pointer that Fisher hits I'd like to donate to an NBA D-Leaguer's salary to give him an incentive to close line Fisher every time he goes to the basket.

Craig Sager's suit is just filthy, he needs to start his own clothing line.


2:10 - Kobe Bryant comes down and buries a three pointer and immediately Doug Collins starts getting naked. Kobe has shot the rock well tonight, you can tell six days of rest did him well.

With 26.5 seconds left in the 3rd, Marv Albert says a stunning stat. Kobe Bryant is shooting his first free throws of the night. David Stern is not going to stand for that, he's immediately on the radio to Tim Donag....errrrrrr Joe Derosa to make sure Kobe starts getting the business. What happens after I write that, Kobe makes his second consecutive trip to the line. This is too easy.

4th Quarter

9:54 Dragic is at the free throw line and Marv Albert just has to come out with the "Dragic coming off his career high Game 3 against the Spurs." I now hate Marv Albert. Dragic can throw up garbage and 1's from the three point line but can't hit a free throw. Sounds about right.

Does anyone else think that if you pushed Phil Jackson over that he'd shatter into pieces like the T-1000 in Terminator 2 : Judgment Day? The guy has to be two hip surgeries deep because he walks like he's on stilts.

T-1000 from Terminator 2: Judgment Day

So while the game is on a commercial my wife turns the movie "Failure to Launch" on. Surprise, a movie with Matthew McConaughey running around half naked tapping hideous chicks (Kate Hudson and Sarah Jessica Parker) with absolutely no plot. Excuse me while I go outside and have a smoke.

7:58 Lopez bangs a 19 footer down and is now 8-10 from the floor with 18 points. Raise your hand if you ever thought Robin Lopez would be the Suns best player tonight. I'm raising my hand........... just kidding.

6:57 Kobe loses the handle of the ball and throws it right to Nash. Nash then leads a fast break, finds Jason Richardson in the corner who buries a three to awaken the half-sober Phoenix crowd. It seems like every Suns game I watch, Jason Richardson his a pre-timeout three pointer that caps off a run. Shades of those 2007 Golden State Warrior days.

4:33 David Stern radios down to one of the referees and Steve Nash gets a phantom lose ball foul called on him. How's it a foul on Nash when Bryant pins Nash's arm against his chest and flails at the ball? It's because David Stern says it was.

At the 3:51 mark you get a flash of a d-bag wearing a LeBron James jersey at a Lakers Suns game. Hey my man, why don't you ask Delonte West how LeBron's mom is doing? Google that if you don't know what I'm talking about.

1:21 Ron Artest hits a three in the corner to bring the Lakers within six to which Doug Collins suggests "Now it's a two possession game." Yes we know Doug, shush.

That next possession Amare Stoudemire just abuses Pau Gasol down low. Stoudemire and Lopez have been absolute beasts tonight, that could be a scary combo for years to come if he stays in Phoenix.

26.8 - Jason Richardson hits another corner three pointer to seal the game. After a runner by Bryant that misses badly, Fisher than head butts Steve Nash and what appears Nash tries to break his nose back into place. I then vommited after watching that, just when I started typing that he did it again. Someone tell that damn Canadian to stop making me sick.

Not a bad night for the NBA, atleast one of the conference finals series won't be a blow out.

"TIDAL WADE!" Why I'd take Dwayne Wade over LeBron James

First off, let me make this clear, in no way do I think LeBron James is overrated, and nor do I think he is a choke artist. This is merely a personal opinion based on my logic, who some say I don't have, and why I would rather have Dwayne Wade than LeBron James. So, before you cut the brakes on my Honda Accord, send Anthrax to my house, or kidnap my cat, let me give you my reasons for why I'd take Wade over James. There may be less than 3% of the people worldwide that would rather have Wade over James, but I'm happy to say I'm part of that 3%. People I've talked to, Justin Denney who agrees with me, Jake Atwater and Bryan Elder who call me a damn fool, know that I've stood by this opinion from Day 1, so this just isn't something I've developed just three hours ago.

Just for the hell of it, career stats:

Lebron James : 47% FG - 33% 3PT - 74% FT - RPG - 7.0 - BLK .88 - 3.3 TO 7.0 AST - 27.8 PPG

Dwayne Wade : 48% FG - 28% 3PT - 77% FT - RPG 5.0 - BLK - .98 - TO - 3.7 - AST 6.6 25.4 PPG

Next I'll highlight things that each player does better than the other:

James is better at getting to the basket, creating match up problems, he flies in the open court, and is the fiercest dunker I've ever seen. He's also a walking triple double.

Wade, although not as good as James, can also get to the basket but he's not 6'8" 265, he's only 6'4". He has a better back to the basket game, has a better mid-range game, and consistently is a better jump shooter than LeBron.

With that being said here is the top 3 reasons why I would rather have Dwayne Wade

HE'S A CHAMPION
Ok, here comes all of LeBron's boyfriends stating that Dwayne Wade had an all-star cast the year he won the NBA title. Be honest, was Miami's team this year that much better than LeBron's? Let's look at the teams
Miami started - Shaquille O'Neal - Antoine Walker - James Posey - Dwayne Wade - Jason Williams.
Cleveland started - Shaquille O'Neal - Antwan Jamison - LeBron James - Anthony Parker - Mo Williams.
Miami has a total of 5 (Mourning, Payton) former all-stars on their team to Cleveland's 4 all-stars. Ok before I hear the "Well Shaq was so much better back then"! True, but is 13.7 ppg and 10.3 ppg really dominating the 2006 NBA Finals? Guess what? That's what Shaq averaged. Funniest comment I've ever heard was "Well the Heat also had Gary Payton!." Gary Payton also averaged 2.7 ppg in the 2006 NBA finals, The Glove doesn't fit anymore. Back to Wade - John Hollinger, who's a stats guru for ESPN, ranked Dwayne Wade's finals performance as the greatest of all time. If you haven't read it, it's right here.

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/playoffs2008/columns/story?columnist=hollinger_john&page=FinalsPerformances-1

Wade averaged 34.7 ppg - 7.8 RPG - 3.8 APG and shot 46.8% from the field. He single handily brought the Heat back from an 0-2 deficit, almost a 0-3 deficit if he hadn't scored 13 points in the last 6 minutes to win game 3 in Miami. Besides Michael Jordan's title runs, it's the single greatest performance I've ever seen by a player on the biggest stage. He took his team and city on his shoulder and beat the Dallas Mavericks in 2006 Finals, he knows how to win.


DOWN THE ROAD
I remember having this conversation with Preston Truman one day at work, we both agreed that what made Michael Jordan the greatest ever is that even though he had lost his athletic ability late in his career, he could still dominate a game by using his mid-range game, post up game, and the ability to get to the line. So 5 or 6 years down the road when LeBron's body starts wearing down from taking the physical abuse, will he be able to adapt his game to what Jordan did? I honestly think he'll struggle with this. Let's face it, LeBron isn't the greatest jump shooter. His game is based off getting into the lane, getting fouled, or dunking on people. You are starting to see more and more teams lay off LeBron and let him shoot open jumpers, because they'd rather have him casting up bricks than having him put his nuts in your face. Now I'm not saying LeBron can't get better at this, but in the 7 years he's been in the league he has yet to develop a consistent jump shot. So what makes me think he'll start now? You saw it happen to Dominique Wilkins, he lost his athleticism and was left with casting up a broke jump shot. Wade is a much better mid-range jump shooter, he still needs to improve his 3 point shooting and he made huge strides this year. What sets Wade apart from James is his ability to post up people, either use his fadeaway or get into the lane to draw a foul or finish at the rim. I'm still shocked that LeBron still hasn't developed this part of his game. Think about it, LeBron is four inches bigger than Wade and Wade still shoots a better percentage than him over the course of his career, mostly because Wade has a more polished mid-range game. If Wade develops a consistent three point shot, he will be the most complete scorer in the NBA.

CLOSING TIME BABY -
This isn't even a debate. Dwayne Wade is a better closer than LeBron James. The biggest knock on LeBron James is that when his opponent shows blood, he doesn't go for it. Take guys like Jordan, Kobe Bryant, and add Dwayne Wade, when they see an opponent down, they go for the throat. Watching game 6 of the game tonight, LeBron James was flustered, he was panicky, and he wound up with 9 turnovers for the game. The last 6 minutes of the game, LeBron James checked out. He flipped off the city of Cleveland and shut it down for the rest of the year. Never saw Jordan do that, and I have never seen Dwayne Wade do that. As I stated above, in the 2006 NBA Finals, with his team floundering, Dwayne Wade scored 13 points in 6 minutes to bring the Miami Heat back from the dead. Dwayne Wade basically looked over to the Dallas Mavericks and said "It's on!." Wade finished with 41 points 13 rebounds and 7 assists and never looked back. There's two people in the NBA right now that I want to take the last shot on my team. The first would be Kobe Bryant, I don't care how old he is, Bryant is the best closer in the game today. Second, Dwayne Wade, he's been on the biggest stage, he's closed out on the biggest stage, and knows when to attack a weak opponent. Now with that being said, LeBron's run through the playoffs in 2007 was impressive. His team was garbage and he took the Cavaliers to the Finals only to be swept by my beloved San Antonio Spurs.

As I stated above, this is a matter of personal opinion. I'm sure the LeBron butt huggers will surely be upset that someone could have chosen a different player over their beloved "King." LeBron may be deemed the King of the NBA but how can you be the King of the NBA without winning a title? I never once said LeBron James wasn't going to be one of the greatest basketball players of all-time but as of right now, even though Wade is 4 years older, Wade has had the better career. Speaking of career, I will end on career awards by each of them. I think you'll see they are fairly similar minus LeBron's 2 MVP Trophy's and Wade's Finals MVP and Championship.

Wade : 2006 Champion & Finals MVP - 2009 NBA Scoring Champion - 2010 All-Star Game MVP - NBA Team - 5 Times (1st 2 2nd 2, 3rd 1) - All Defensive Team (2005,2009,2010) - All Rookie Team - 2008 United States Gold Medalist - Six Time All-Star

James : NBA MVP (2009,2010) - NBA Rookie of the Year 2004 - 2008 NBA Scoring Champion - Six Time All-Star - NBA Team 6 Times (2005-2010) - All Defensive Team (2009,2010) - 2008 United States Gold Medalist - All Star Game MVP 2 -

Let the debate begin

The Booze has gone flat : Time to say Goodbye to Carlos Boozer

In the Summer of 2004 I was working at Living Scriptures in Ogden, probably the most awful place in the history of mankind. Ike "The Slinky" Tingey was my co-worker, he walked into our break room and said "Lew, the Jazz just signed Carlos Boozer!" After I had stopped drinking the Pledge under the break room sink to try and poison myself, I couldn't help but get excited. We finally had a legitimate power forward since Karl Malone had retired. It's now 2010, the Jazz have just finished getting slapped around like a red headed step child, swept by the Lakers. Now this topic isn't all about Carlos Boozer being the only problem for the Jazz getting their ass handed to them but he is the main problem. Below is a list of reasons why Carlos Boozer must be allowed to walk away from this franchise and I think you'll find all of the reasons reasonable to let him walk.

Drama - Carlos is like a 16 year old girl. He's like the girl in high school that will come up to you by your lockers and say "Boy, do I feel like excrement today." And of course the girl expects the guy to ask "Well what's wrong?" Last year when Boozer, while sitting out with injuries from a hang nail to a big zit on his scalp, comes out and says "I'm opting out." The season is in December, why on God's green earth would you tell an ESPN columnist that you are opting out of your contract after the Jazz had just won a game coming from behind? He needs all the attention, he needs to be the guy, he wants to be the leader. The only problem is that he doesn't want to work for anything, he wants to be deemed the guy because he's an NBA player. I can't tell for sure but I don't think Deron Williams is a huge fan of Booze. Every year drama surrounds Boozer. He missed half the season in his first year. He misses 3/4 of the year his second year due to injuries. His third season he was actually cleaner than Paris Hilton, which isn't saying much. His fourth year he disappeared in playoff games quicker than a bottle of Vodka at a Lindsay Lohan dinner table. His fifth year he was going through marital problems with CeCe because she didn't want to live in Utah and include his opting out statement. This year it was trade speculation, he blabbed his mouth all over the media that he wanted to be traded to Miami or Chicago, yet the start of the season rolls around and he's still here. Kind of like when you tell your friends that your staying home for the night and then they catch you with a chick at a movie leading to some uncomfortable silence between everyone. That's how the locker room had to have been this year.

6'8" 265 but plays 6'4" 125 - I don't think I've seen a bigger man be a bigger sissy in my entire life. Kind of like the muscle heads you see at the gym, they check themselves out in the mirror by flexing their trap muscles but if someone gets in their face they tuck their hoo hoo in between their legs. Bryan Elder and I were watching the game tonight and not once did we see Carlos take it to the chest of Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum. Everything was a wrap around, a fadeaway, or the infamous drive to the basket, scream, and shout an expletive at the ref. I never saw Karl Malone do that, Reggie Miller agreed with me. I don't know why Boozer is so scared of contact. The man is built like a Peterbilt diesel but plays like a Geo Prism. If I had Boozer's body, I would first quit waxing my armpit hair as my wife somehow notices those things. But I would be taking the ball to the rack, dunking on people, sticking my butt in their face while hanging on the rim, and then tell the player I just dunked on I'm coming after their family. Boozer could be so good if he had any type of work ethic. If he spent the Summer with Karl Malone on his ranch, learned how to be a man, he would be an all-star every year. Now he would also probably come back talking in third person like Karl Malone. Until Boozer finally gets his man card back, he just another 6'8" power forward that doesn't like to use his power.

Luxury Tax - The Luxury tax next year will be around 58 to 60 million dollars. So we have AK on the books for 17, Memo for 9, Paul Millsap for 7, CJ Miles (he should be playing for Doritos) for 3.7, D Will for 14 million and add in the rest, we are hovering around the 54 to 55 million dollar mark. Enough to sign John Crotty for the veterans minimum. The Jazz can't afford Boozer unless they want to go into luxury tax again. And there is only 5 players I'd pay the luxury tax for: 1. Dwight Howard 2. Lebron James 3. Dwayne Wade 4. Chris Bosh 5. Kobe Bryant and just to be honest 6. Manu Ginobili (Ya, I went there. I can dream, I'd wear a bandage on my nose to every game at Energy Solutions arena, and I'd probably move next door to him. Deal with it, I like Ginobili.) So unless Boozer wants to play for 6 million a year next year, than let's talk. But to be honest, even if Boozer said "Hey Jazz fans, I'll play for 1 million next year!" I still don't think I'd take him. Thanks but no thanks Booze, but we can't afford you. Shucks.

Paul Millsap - We matched Paul Millsap's offer from the Portland Trailblazers for a reason right? I mean, we are paying Paul 32 million over 4 years, which at first I did not like. I can't dislike the guy though, he plays extremely hard. Do I think he's the answer at the power forward position right now? No, but the kid is still raw, why not give him a full season to be deemed the starter and see what numbers he can put up.

Time to start over - Boozer isn't the only one that needs to be replaced but I think it's time to start shopping AK. It's too hard to shop Okur because of his injury in the playoffs. That's like trying to sell a salvaged title car. "Ya the car is in great condition, except for the garbage truck that dumped feces all over the interior." I wrote in my last blog topic that the Jazz should trade AK and the New York Knicks 1st round pick to Houston for Yao Ming. Even if they laugh in our face at least you made the offer. The front office can't sit on their hands and wait for Okur to finally play defense, Millsap to grow another 3 inches, and Deron Williams to stop dying his hair black. But seriously D-Will, what's with the artist formerly known as Prince hair color? They need to rejuvenate this franchise, much like they did in 2004 with signing Boozer and Okur, except this time bring in defense.

It's an end to another disappointing seasons, and it ended with us being taken out back to the woodshed by the Lakers. I wrote in a previous topic that the Jazz were like Buster Douglas and the Nuggets were like Mike Tyson and we knocked out Tyson. Well this series was like the movie Bloodsport. Where that massive Asian Chun Li just lights up Jean Claude Van Damme's American biker friend. That's what it felt like, getting our head stomped in. In one of the most anticipated off-season's in the history of the Jazz, I'm willing to bet the Jazz make a stupid offer to Boozer, he signs, and we have to keep drinking the flat Boozer. Maybe Orlando has room on their bandwagon, if so, all aboard€!

In & Out : Who stays and who goes for next years Utah Jazz

Well here we are. We just got done watching Kobe Bryant rip our hearts out for the third straight year, Carlos Boozer forgetting to box out, and another year of watching Jerry Sloan give up the open three ball to opposing teams. Excuse me while I pour some Jack Daniels in my Coke Zero. With a 1 and infinity chance to come back and win this series, we need to take an in depth look on who should be staying on the Jazz and who should be packing their bags. Now obviously I may be a little bit biased because I dislike some players on the Jazz but I think they are realistic. It honestly gets emotionally draining watching the same end to the Jazz season over and over. They start slow to start the season, they catch fire the second half of the season, they lose key games down the stretch to get screwed on a seeding, and get blitzed by the Lakers. So with that being said, let's break down player by player who stays and who gets the hell out.

Deron Williams - K I really don't need to write anything here. D-Will is one of the top 3 point guards in the league. He obviously stays. That's like asking me if I'd rather be kicked in the butt or the nuts, pretty obvious answer right? D-Will has struggled in the Lakers series but he's still averaging 19 ppg and almost 9 apg. I'd take that all season long, hell I'd take 16 and 8 a night from him. He stays.

Wesley Matthews - Matthews has really grown on me this year. The kid is still raw and he's only going to get better. Plus, he's the only guy on the Jazz that doesn't tuck his hoo hoo in between his legs when he goes up against a superstar. In a past topic I posted that he gets punched but he punches right back. Tonight he wasn't afraid to play Kobe physical. Now with only paying him $457,000 a year, we will obviously need to pay him. He stays.

CJ Miles - Quite possibly could go down in Jazz history as my least favorite Jazz player. (Note: Greg Ostertag, Chris Morris, and Derek Fisher are the top 3) Here's the story of CJ's season. If he hits two shots in a row, it won't matter if he misses his next seven. He will keep casting away. He plays outside his abilities, he's a very average defender, and is streakier than a 4 year old's underpants. For 3.7 million a year over 4 years, I think we could honestly give that money to Matthews or half that to Matthews and deal Miles to Saudi Arabia. Miles is out.

Carlos Boozer - I'm neutral on this move. I had this discussion with Ike Tingey, and Ike would like to see Boozer go. I'm not so quick to execute Boozer. I agree with Ike that we need a defensive minded center, and the 12 million we are paying Boozer could be a nice payday for a center in the off-season. What if we could have both? What if we were able to shop Andrei Kirilenko's contract? That's 16.7 million off the books and 10 million of that we could add a defensive center to protect Boozer. 20 and 10 guys don't grow on trees, but this tree is almost dead. If we deal Kirilenko's contract, Boozer stays. If we don't, the Paul Millsap era begins in Salt Lake City.

Mehmet Okur - I don't mind Mehmet Okur, but for 9 million this year, 9.45 million next year, and 10 million the next year I mind. A 7 foot shooting guard isn't what the Jazz need and that's exactly what he gives you. Especially since Okur just turned his achillies into a fruit roll up in the first round of the playoffs. (Note: I just added fruit rollups to my grocery list) We unfortunately need a banger down low, but with the possibility of Boozer leaving, we could maybe move Okur back to the four, still bring Millsap off the bench and add a defensive minded center. Just maybe. For now, we hang onto Mr Uni brow. (Sidenote : While I was writing this blog topic, do you guys notice that the chicks on the single commercials saying "call now!" are all immaculate? I guarantee you they look like Sloth off the Goonies. I can just picture some guy calling and saying "well hey sweet cheeks" and the girl replying "HHHHEEEEEYYYYYY YOOOOOUUUUUUU GUUUUUUUUYYYYYYSSSSS!") Sorry back on task. If Boozer goes he stays, if Boozer stays, Okur has to be shopped.

Andrei Kirilenko - If he wasn't making more money than Yao Ming, Amare Stoudemire, Carmelo Anthony, Joe Johnson, Dwight Howard, Dwayne Wade, Chris Bosh, and Vince Carter, I'd say keep him. If you don't believe me, go to HoopsHype.com, it's honestly sickening to see how much money that guy makes. It's pretty obvious, Kirilenko is not worth 16.43 million dollars. He's maybe worth 6 at the most, and that's pushing it. He can't finish a season healthy, teams don't have to guard him from the foul line and out, he weighs a 120 lbs being 6'9", and what the hell is up with his hair? He checked into the game tonight and I looked at my wife and said "Suuuunnnnnnssssshiiiiinnneeeee!" The look has to go Andrei, and unfortunately so do you. AK is out.

Kyle Korver - Probably the best pure shooter in the league. Tonight, you saw how deadly Korver can be. He spaces the floor, he makes other teams best defenders work through screens, he's automatic from the free throw line, he doesn't get enough credit for being a good help defender, and he could probably score with any chick in Utah. No one is a good on ball defender these days because if you sneeze on any player like Kobe you get a foul called on you. For 5 million a year I think Korver is priced right, I'd even pay him 6 million to stay. I think the Jazz hang onto him and I think he moves into the starting lineup next year as long as he stays healthy. He could be the new Jazz's version of Jeff Hornacek minus the two blown out knees that Jeff was on. Kyle stays

Kyrylo Fesenko - Fes is still extremely raw and Sloan never gave him an opportunity to gain any experience by playing in the regular season. In the first half, I saw Fes make it difficult for the Lakers to score in the paint, the only problem is that he doesn't give you anything offensively. He doesn't make the opposing centers work but I'd still like to give him one more year. I'd like to see him come off the bench next year and get regular minutes, around 15 - 20 next season. If he can get a little better offensively, I think he's a nice asset. I give him one more year for the lowest amount possible. Maybe 1 million per year.

Kosta Koufous - Kosta is on the all NBA hideous team. Here is my starting 5. Koufous starts at the 5, Pau Gasol starts at the 4, Richard Jefferson at the 3, Adam Morrison at the 2, and Sam Cassel at the 1. I know Cassel is retired but Cassel is the ugliest player in the history of the league. Some how this has taken over the topic of Koufous staying or going. It's simple, Koufous shouldn't be near an NBA arena nor a church gym. Find a poor team to take him off our hands, maybe the Clippers? WAIT! Chris Kaman takes the place of Koufous on the NBA all ugly team. Sorry, Koufous goes.

Ronnie Price - Boy I like Ronnie Price, I like his intensity, I like that he hustles, but at the end of the game, he just doesn't give you anything offensively. He has trouble getting the 2nd unit into the offense and when he bombs a three I almost stab myself in the eye with a pen. For 1.4 million to be a backup I can't argue but I'm just not sold on him. I think they release Gaines, keep Ronnie Price on but move him to the third guard. I think there is a better backup point guard out there. Hang onto him for now for 1 more year.

Well, it's the season's end. I will officially be cheering for the Orlando Magic. I haven't been shy about professing my love for Matt Barnes because he's a rockstar but I also love how the Magic play. It's disappointing how the Jazz season ended, I feel bad for people that are paying good money for season tickets because they see the same ending over and over. With that being said, I say goodnight. Well not really, I'm going to finish watching Lethal Weapon. Night.

MEMO TO JAZZ GM : After 3 years, wouldn't you learn your lesson?

After watching the 2nd game of the Utah Jazz Los Angeles Lakers series and I heard that the Jazz had just lost their 16th straight game at the Staples Center, I thought to myself "Gee, have the Jazz management been watching the same league the fans are?" Let's say I'm the GM of the Utah Jazz (we would have won 3 titles by now) and I know in the back of my mind "Well hell, the Lakers are the team to beat, what do I need to do to compete against them?" Anyone on earth can answer this question, it's size and a defensive minded center. Now, I don't know if Kevin O'Connor is waiting for Carlos Boozer to grow a pair of nuts or if he's waiting for Paul Millsap to grow another 6 inches but you'd think the man would have enough brains to make a change. Realistically, besides drafting Paul Millsap, finding Wes Matthews, and trading for Korver, what has O'Connor done? (chirp, chirp, chirp). We know that Mehmet Okur is not the answer, we know that playing Carlos Boozer with Paul Millsap isn't the answer (I seriously question Sloans thinking here), and we know that the two seven footers wearing diapers on the bench (Fes and Koufous) aren't the answers. So let's discuss some moves that make the Jazz better and of course some of the moves may not be reaslistic, but this is my blog not yours, so eat me.

We know that Andrei Kirilenko's contract is going to be a hot commodity this Summer, why you say? Because his deal expires next year, and teams will be looking to get rid of contracts. So......

Brendan Haywood - The Haywood experiment didn't work in Dallas obviously because he's making tee times in his home town of North Carolina. Haywood is a legitimate active seven footer. He blocks shots, he rebounds, and every once in awhile will give you garbage points. The Jazz don't need more offense, we need defense, Haywood comes in and starts immediately. You start: Williams, Matthews, Kirilenko, Boozer/Millsap, Haywood. Okur with Millsap, if Boozer stays, comes off the bench to make our bench deeper. You combat the Lakers length with Haywood (7 feet) and Okur off the bench (7 feet).

Yao Ming - This would be a huge gamble for the Jazz, I don't think Houston does it, but you make the offer. Houston I think will go into full blown rebuilding mode and they are sick of Yao being injured. Two offers : First - You offer Anderi Kirilenko's expiring contract, the first round pick we get from New York, and our regular first round pick for Yao Ming. Second - You sign and trade Carlos Boozer, and New York's first round pick, and CJ Miles for Yao Ming. Here's why I like it : Houston gets a low post presence in Boozer long term, they get a nice young player in CJ Miles, and what looks like to be a top 10 pick. The Jazz get 7'7" Yao Ming and some serious height. Guess what? Yao's deal expires after next year, so what do we have to lose? If all else fails, Kirilenko comes off the books after next year, and Yao's contract would come off the books next year. Can you imagine : Williams, Matthews, Kirilenko/Miles (Depending on what offer they take) Millsap/Boozer and Yao Ming. Wow I just got extremely excited, excuse me while I grab a pillow.

Tyson Chandler - Chandler is on the books for one more year at 12.75 million. So, we offer Charlotte Andrei Kirilenko's expiring deal for Tyson Chandler and DJ Augustin. Charlotte gets cap space relief do to Kirilenko's expriring deal, we take back the same amount of contracts, pick up a nice backup point guard, and we get immediate help at the center position. Now if only Chandler could stay healhty and not sit out every game whenever he gets a hang nail.

Joel Pryzbilla - Pryzbilla gives us a 7'1" banger down on a block that we have never had. Pryzbilla is on the books in Portland for 7 million next year and Portland will be looking to shop him. Especially with Oden signed and Camby working on an extension. We could trade a 2nd round pick and cash considerations to Portland for Pryzbilla's services. So we'd start Williams, Matthews, Kirilenko, Okur/Millsap & Pryzbilla. Bringing in Pryzbilla means we would say goodbye to Boozer but we'd still be able to bring back Korver at 3 or 4 million a year.

Samuel Dalembert - The poor man's Diekembe Mutombo would fit in nicely with the Jazz. A legitimate shot blocker that won't command possessions but will command the paint. He is on the block next year for 12. 5 million so we'd have to trade Kirilenko for Samuel Dalembert and Jason Kapono. We kill two birds with one stone, we get a legitimate shot blocker, and we get a shooter to replace Korver in Kapono even though Kapono's contract expires after 2011.

Brad Miller - Guess who is a free agent next year? 7 foot Brad Miller and he will only command the veterans minimum. If we choose not to resign Boozer, that's something the Jazz could offer him. Signing Miller for the vet minimum means we could also bring Korver here. It also still allows us to shop Kirilenko's expiring deal all summer and going into the season.

Above like I say is just a few options the Jazz could look at for next year. I'm not saying this would be a terrific answer, but it's start without damaging our payroll for the next 10 years. And I'm also fine with it because I'm tired of watching 6'6 Millsap and 6'7 Boozer guard two seven footers and us not being able to compete against the Lakers. The deals above would make us better defensively which is what we need desperately. Kevin O'Connor, hopefully you read this blog.

Los Angeles Lakers vs Utah Jazz - Preview of Western Conference Semis

"Rise and shine campers because it's GROUNDHOG DAY!" Boy it seems like we can't rid of the Lakers and their twin towers. Just to be straight, I don't like this matchup for the Utah Jazz. There was two teams I didn't want to see in the playoffs: San Antonio Spurs or the Los Angeles Lakers, I definitley didn't want to see the latter. So here we are, matching up with the defending champs for the 3rd year in a row and for the 3rd year in a row I may try something that will harm my body. Here is the top 3 reasons why I don't like the matchup with the Lakers.

1. Length
The Lakers have two seven footers that matchup nicely with our 6'6" power forwards in Carlos Boozer and Paul Millsap. The human camel (Gasol) has a knack for making life a living hell for Jerry Sloan, mainly because we've had a soft 7 footer (Mehmet Okur) guarding him. Kyrlo Fesenko might be the most important player on the Jazz this series. Fes NEEDS to stay out of foul trouble, he is the only one who can body up with Bynum or Gasol. When Boozer and Millsap are both on the floor, all hell may break lose. There is no way on God's green earth that we will stop Gasol with Millsap or Boozer guarding him. Mind if I have a smoke right now?

2. Kobe Bryant & Lamar Odom
So Mr. Kardashian eeerrrrr Lamar Odom seems to play well against the Jazz. Mainly because we always have Carlos "Swinging Door" Boozer guarding him. And let's be honest, Boozer makes quite a bit of players look like all-stars. Odom might be the most versatile player in the league when his head isn't in the clouds. Andrei Kirilenko would be the best choice to guard him, the only problem is Kirilenko is dragging his leg around like Tom Sizemore in "Saving Private Ryan." (Note: Saving Private Ryan might be the best war movie of all-time, if you haven't seen it, you are doing yourself a disservice)
Onto the Black Mamba - - read my previous post as to what the hell a "Black Mamba is." Kobe Bryant, the man who gets more calls in this league other than Lebron James and Keving Durant. Well, that's according to his tree-hugging-hippie-liberal coach Phil Jackson, who has now gone down in history as the biggest hypocrite of all-time. Normally we would have no answer for Kobe Bryant, which we don't, no one does. I am interested in seeing how Wesley Matthews does on him, I thought Matthews was unreal defending Carmelo Anthony, but let's face it, Melo isn't Kobe. Just like Khloe Kardashian isn't Kim Kardashian. Kobe will get his points, but it's all about keeping other players in check.

3. The Lakers
It seems the Jazz urinate on themselves when they see on their schedule "Los Angeles Lakers." I don't know why, the Oklahoma City Thunder weren't scared of them, the San Antonio Spurs aren't scared of them. The Jazz have the talent to beat the Lakers, it's all mental. Boozer disappears quicker than a bottle of Vodka with Kristin Cavallari against the Lakers. (Come on, you knew a Hills reference was coming) Does Phil Jackson intimidate Jerry Sloan? Maybe, but I'm taking Sloan over Jackson in a bar fight anyday of the week. (Can you imagine Sloan in a bar fight? He's one of those guys that will break a beer bottle over your head and call you a dirty expletive while you're on the ground.) The Lakers in a whole terrify the Jazz, and this is their chance to show we can compete against them. I received a text message from a friend last night named Preston Truman saying "the Lakers are beatable." It does seem the Lakers are beatable, they did stumble down the stretch quicker than Kirstie Alley down the food pyramid to fatty foods.

All in all, I think the Jazz put up a good fight against the Lakers, but I think they ultimately lose to them. Homecourt advantage will play a big role in this series. The wildcard might be if we get a healthy Kirilenko back and if Fes can stay out of foul trouble and not poop himself when tip off comes tomorrow afternoon. I'm cheering for the Jazz, I hope I am wrong about my prediction, but they just don't have the horses, especially when they are going up against the human camel (Gasol)

Lakers win this series 4-2